Thursday, April 2, 2015

April Flop

So I planned this hilarious April Fool's joke for David. I stole the idea from Heather at The Spohrs are Multiplying and decided that Zuzu and I would trick David when we made lunch.

We took the girls to the zoo on Wednesday morning. The weather was gorgeous, so we got there early enough to beat the crowd and left at 11:00am. David asked if we wanted to walk through the River's Edge section, but Zuzu and I were more than ready to go. She had a meltdown on the carousel because she wanted to ride the giraffe but it was already taken.

(Sidenote: She is currently really into giraffes, based in part on this book Giraffes Can't Dance that David reads to her almost every night these days. So she's always talking about Gerard the Giraffe and when we got to the zoo, she immediately said, "I want to see Gerard!" Last night when I was reading the book to her--while David was at his THIRD fantasy baseball draft--I realized that the giraffe's name is actually Gerald. Regardless, we strolled out of the zoo with her sobbing, "But I want Gerard!" I've decided Gerard the Giraffe is Gerald's sophisticated older brother.)

Anyway, we got home from the zoo and David took the girls upstairs for changes and hand-washing, and I scurried around to make grilled cheeses. I'd started carefully planning this on Tuesday when I went to the store.

Step (1): I bought a pound cake. I peeled the sticker off so it didn't say "pound cake" and casually mentioned to David that I'd picked up some good bakery bread for grilled cheeses.

Step (2): I bought a container of buttercream icing. It already has a yellowish tint, but I added red and yellow food coloring to it to make it velveeta-orange.

Step (3): When I started lunch, I sliced the poundcake and toasted two pieces of it in the toaster oven. Then I spread the frosting over, adding plenty so that it smooshed out the sides just bit and looked like melty cheese. (It obviously didn't look quite right, but if you were expecting grilled cheese and didn't look at it too closely, it totally worked.)

Step (4): I put some potato chips on the side and told David his sandwich was ready.

David wanted to watch part of a ballgame, so he took his plate into the TV room. Zuzu and I tiptoed into the dining room to peek around the corner and watch him eat. I'd told Zu that we were playing a trick on Daddy and to get ready to yell "April Fools!"

So we watched as David ate a chip.

Then he took a drink of water.

AT LAST, he took a bite of sandwich.

I stifled giggles and waited for his reaction.

He chewed, swallowed, and TOOK ANOTHER BITE.

No comment, no weird expression.

I said, "Are you KIDDING me?" and started cracking up.

He said, "What?"

I said, "How's your grilled cheese?" (Zuzu was also giggling even though I don't think she knew what was funny, but I couldn't stop laughing.)

He said, "Kind of sweet."


He said, "I wondered why I couldn't really taste the cheese."

And that, my friends, is an April Flop. We yelled "April FOOLS" anyway, but it wasn't quite what I'd been imagining.

I'll never beat the year that I convinced him the shed had collapsed in the backyard right after he spent two days painting it (he still talks about it). I think I need to give up the practical jokes and go back to drama/acting if I really want to trick him...

Any good jokesters out there? I considered saran wrapping the toilet, but let's face it: we are cleaning up enough pee as it is around here.


  1. LOL I thought it was funny, but I'm sure the reaction kind of ruined it! My husband always set up cereal boxes so they'd fall out of cabinets when they were opened. The only other joke I can think of is the taping the faucet sprayer.

  2. Flop? That's hilarious! I bet you years from now you'll laugh about this every time you make grilled cheese.

  3. Best pranks I remember:

    In grade 5 someone brought an alarm clock to school and set it to go off every 5 minutes. Every time it rang we all got up and wordlessly changed seats. It was awesome.

    In high school we filled our English teacher's office with balloons. We also pulled many pranks on fellow dorm students who went out of town and did not lock their doors: blown-up condoms stuck to the ceiling, turning everything upside-down, cleaning one particularly messy room and alphabetizing her books...

    I think I will try this grilled cheese one on my own kids next year! :)

  4. I think I read that book 100 times last month. After that, it was Green Eggs & Ham. Now we're on to some Mickey book. I wish my kid would get a little variety. But noooooo.

    I basically can't stop laughing about the cake and frosting. I told Elliot and was in tears. You're so damn funny.

  5. That's hilarious!

    PS. The giraffes aren't in rivers edge anyway, they are by big cat country. We will have to go again soon while all these pesky spring breakers are back in school! ;)

  6. lol! I'm kinda gagging at the thought of him eating pound cake with icing WITH chips. gag gag gag.

  7. I love Giraffes Can't Dance. Funny, I was reading thinking, Gerard? Really? I thought his name was Gerald? Also my husband does like three or four fantasy football teams. Ugh. He always promises to make money, but I'm not sure it works that way. Also, no pranks here but my secretary got fired that day.

  8. that is hilarious!! this post makes me want to do practical jokes on my husband...