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image from here |
For nearly two years I've used this blog to try to articulate what it's long to lose a child and try to continue living. No matter how I write it or think it or dream it, it all comes down to a few simple truths.
I love her.
I miss her.
My life will always be worse because she is not here.
My life is immeasurably better because she was here.
Today I'm lighting a candle and remembering our Eliza, and far too many other babies who aren't here with the families who love them.
We will always wish for you.
I'd love it if you'd leave a comment with the name of the baby you're remembering today.
Emelina Feb 21 2012
ReplyDeleteHayes, Eliza and all of the other sweet babies that have brought us all together.
ReplyDeleteToo many, many names to list.
ReplyDeleteBraedon Danger 07/13/2011 Forever missed.
So many to name. So many in my thoughts today.
ReplyDeleteMissing my boy
Alexander David - February 27, 2012
Sending love
Cale Harrison Hidalgo.
ReplyDeletesimply, and perfectly put Brooke.
Harper Greer Sturniolo. 6/19/2011. I've been following your blog for about six months. Thank you for putting into words " our " experience.
ReplyDeleteSo simple. So true. Thanks as always for sharing to help us all.
ReplyDeleteRemembering Phineas William Reese 1.10.2011.
Bear Trangsrud.
ReplyDeleteAnd way too many other beautiful and oh so loved children.
Thinking of your Eliza along with my William and Ethan as well as all all of the other babies held in our hearts and not our arms.
ReplyDeleteEva Margaret 8/14-10/8/10 and Lumi 5/21/12
ReplyDeleteEliza Taylor Duckworth
ReplyDeleteEverything here is soo true. Thank you for always being able to put it all into words
ReplyDeleteAlways loved/always missed
Kenli Rooke 06/26/11-gone at 41 weeks
Kyndal Reight 08/29/12- gone at 37 weeks
It seems so wrong that there are so many of us with empty arms on this night. The irony also sets in when I remember what I was doing two years ago today (finding out I was pregnant with kenli and trying to come up with the best way of telling my husband), when I still had my innocence. I miss the old me but I miss my babies more and just like you said I would never wish them away because I am a better person because of them.
Thank you Brooke, for giving all of us a voice
Thanks Brooke.
ReplyDeleteMira Joy 8.31.11 11:32 pm - 12:12am 9.1.11
.....and of course your Eliza, and Eva, Ellis, Margaret, Bernhard, Marlo, Ethan...too many....too many....
KO from glow
Makenna Marie
ReplyDeleteMakenna Marie
ReplyDeleteMy first niece... Laura Kate. We will never even know what our lives are missing without her.
ReplyDeleteJeremy Ryan Wilson 2-27-2011
ReplyDeleteThadious. Holden. Mark.
ReplyDeleteA dear friend (and second mother while I was in high school) had three miscarriages before she and her husband decided to live child free. They were never named, but I know how wonderful a real mom she would've been, and my heart breaks every time I think of them.
ReplyDeleteBaby M, September 2011
ReplyDeleteAlways remembering your Eliza. <3
ReplyDeleteThank you Brooke
Remembering always Emily Mcintosh Hatch. 22 january 2012 ❤
Andrej
ReplyDelete14 March 2011 - 18 March 2011.
Forever missed.
Forever loved.
Thank you for sharing your Eliza with us.
Love,
Mariana
A, C, and baby V. Why am I just now realizing that I can comment without linking my blog? (so silly) Brooke you are beautiful. I check your blog once, twice, thrice times a day just to see if you have posted. You keep me connected to this world and say all of the things that I cannot. I remember Eliza with you always and forever. ~Missy
ReplyDeleteBrayden, Lauren, and Madison.
ReplyDeleteBrendan.
Eliza.
<3
Brittany Nichole Peed 11/6/94
ReplyDeleteJasper 06/08/2009
ReplyDeleteGenevieve Claire Muthler
ReplyDeleteMason, Kaden, Peanut
ReplyDeleteTheo, Ruby and Emily
ReplyDeleteTanaLee 11/13/09 - 06/16/10
ReplyDeleteForever loved, Forever missed.
Far too many babies being remembered instead of kissed each day.
Hugs-
Felicia
Shaina Gail
ReplyDeleteJanuary 18, 2007
Carter Alan 8/29/09
ReplyDeleteI love those quotes!
ReplyDeleteLiam 1/3/2011
Evelynn 4/22/12 to 4/24/12
And all of the other babies I have come to know this past couple years.
Remembering my cousin's baby girl,
ReplyDeleteElizabeth Jean
10-14-2012 at 30 weeks
and all the other babies gone too soon.
My William Daniel. November 14, 2011
ReplyDeleteThank you for this post...it touched my heart.
Preston Joshua 12/15/2010
ReplyDeleteThank you, Brooke, for being so honest about your grief and helping so many of us to understand this journey of grief and for always saying it so beautifully.
Thank you for your transparency. In so many ways it is helping in my healing.
ReplyDeleteAnnalise Chloe and Emmalyn Claire Coker
Eliza Taylor Duckworth
ReplyDeleteUrijah Matthew Ohman (October 8, 2012)
My dear friend's baby girl: Margaret August (8.12.2010)
ReplyDeleteMorgan Jennie. 10/17/2009
ReplyDeleteDeena
Garrett James Denslaw 12-6-2004/ 12/18/2004, my 1st grandson, our little star in heaven.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteMissing and loving Elizabeth, our little Roo, who died just short of three months old in March 2011.
ReplyDeleteBrooke, thank you for being one of the first beacons of light and hope I saw in the wilderness of those early days, even though you were still in the early days of missing Eliza, too.
Who am I kidding, these are still in many ways the early days of our grief, aren't they?
Margaret Joy. Missing her so much, that day & every day.
ReplyDeleteLove Meeker, Jan 19th 2011
ReplyDeleteLate, but not forgotten.
ReplyDeleteAndrew Steven Wilson
Also, I love that second picture/quote. I've never seen or heard it before. Beautiful.
Katie (Kathleen Maria).
ReplyDeleteI am sooooo far behind on blogging & commenting! But your blog is definitely one of my favourites. ; ) So glad you have continued to write & share about both your beautiful girls.
In memory of Blue, born sleeping 8/10/11, at 25 weeks, 3 days gestation.
ReplyDeleteAnd in honor of Jed, born 10/15/12, alive and kicking.