It's the Holiday Season. So Whoop-dee-do.

I've been thinking a lot about how this will be our first Christmas without Eliza.

And then I remembered, oh yeah, except for last Christmas.

She was born on December 6.  So this will be our second Christmas without her, our first Thanksgiving without her.  In fact, last Thanksgiving, she was alive and well, hanging out in my belly at my family baby shower, kicking happily as I unwrapped baby quilts and a car seat and those little Trumpette socks that look like mary-janes.

I'm not ready to face a family holiday without Eliza.  After spending so much time imagining her there with us, being there without her would be impossibly hard.  Even though I know how much my family loves us (and loves her) and even though I miss them and I haven't been home since last Thanksgiving, I just can't do it.  I think they will understand.  At least, I hope so.

I was so excited for everyone to meet her, for her to be the baby that everyone fussed over and wanted to hold.  I could just see it in my mind, how this year's holidays would be.  And I am so not ready to have the family and the food and not have my baby there.  The whole idea makes me want to puke.

So our plan for the holidays this year is to ignore them completely.  As I told David's aunt, when she sent us "Merry Christmas!!!" and "Happy New Year!!!" texts last year (yes, I'm serious), we are not celebrating the holidays.  We are simply trying to survive them.

We're going out of town for Thanksgiving--taking a drive up to Chicago.  We'll drive up on Thursday (you know, like it's any other day of the year), stay in a hotel downtown, go shopping on Michigan Avenue, see a show, have lunch with some friends on Saturday (Mexican!), and hit up IKEA on the way home.  (It is quite possible that IKEA was the source of inspiration for this trip.)  Or it may be that shopping feels too "Christmasy" and fun, in which case we'll spend the weekend holed up in our swanky hotel room (thanks, Priceline) watching TV.  Whatever.

We're also ignoring Christmas all together.  I'm going to send gifts to David's family, but my family has opted not to exchange gifts (meaning, my mom and I made an executive decision).  Some of my girlfriends and I normally exchange, but we're skipping it this year, although a little bird told me they're going to get me an Eliza necklace, which I will gratefully (and probably tearfully) accept.  Otherwise, I am NOT PARTICIPATING in Christmas.

Instead, we're going to go to Mexico and spending a week touring Juarez.  I hear it's really nice this time of year.  We're hoping to pay for our trip by offering to carry a few duffle bags back over the border with us.

OK, not funny.

Really we're going to Puerto Vallarta, and spending a week at an adults-only all-inclusive resort.  The website looks really nice, and we opted for adults-only to avoid the agony of looking at adorable toddler thighs in swimming suits, but my brother said that "adults-only" means nude beach and a resort full of pervs.  (Perhaps he has experience with this?).  So then I told him that we chose this resort precisely because the swimming pool is Nudes Only and the only thing we like more than being naked is being naked in front of a bunch of naked strangers.  And I invited him to join us because I'm totally cool like that.

OK, not funny.

I mean, we actually had that conversation, but as far as I know, we'll be wearing swimsuits to the pool and I have no desire to be naked in front of naked strangers or my naked brother (ooh--gag reflex just kicked in).

I'm sure the resort will be blaring Christmas music and doing the lights and the trees and all the Christmas hoopla, but we're just going to do our best to ignore it.  We'll probably spend Christmas day ordering room service and playing gin rummy.  Or maybe we'll hang out by the pool and see who can take the most tequila shots before they puke!  Just making some Christmas memories.

I am currently accepting advice on how to survive the holidays, what I can expect from an adults-only, all-inclusive resorts, and how best to plan for a shopping spree at IKEA.