Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Mother's Day

Today is Mother's Day.

This morning I woke up at 8am.  I hadn't slept well, even though I was exhausted after working Saturday morning and spending the afternoon at a couples' baby shower.  David and I came home from the shower and I fell asleep watching the movie we'd Netflixed, even though it was one of my choices.  I blamed it on the two glasses of white wine I'd had at the shower. 

Overshare (the first of many, no doubt):  I was using the wine to self-medicate my PMS symptoms, which were out of control.  I was crampy, bloated, achy, tired, and one sad country song away from tears at any given moment.

Sunday morning, I walked into the bathroom, brushed my teeth, threw my hair in a pony tail, and yanked on a pair of jeans.  As I walked out the door, I turned to David and said, "I'll be right back."

He said, "Where are you going?"

I said, "You know where I'm going."  (Turns out David had no idea where I was going and just hoped that I would show back up in a few minutes, possibly with donuts).

The thing is, in spite of my unmistakable PMS symptoms, I still hadn't actually needed the tampons that I bought on Friday.  So I drove to Wal-Greens for the second time in three days. 

I walked to the "Family Planning" aisle and contemplated all the tests, having a sort of interior dialogue with myself:

Should I splurge for digital so we can be sure?  I mean, only the best for Baby Duck, right?  But really?  Am I going to spend $20 on something that I pee on?  Still, I want to make sure that it is accurate.  What if I can't figure out how to read the test?  OMG you have a freaking PhD, if you can't read the test you are an idiot.  Shut up!  Just buy something!

In the end, I silenced the schizophrenic debate and bought the cheapest one -- the two-for-one test set that was on sale for $9.99 (a $2 savings!).

I stood in line, antsy and increasingly uncomfortable, because I still hadn't peed that morning.  I had no idea what was going on in my uterus, but things were getting intense in the bladder department. 

I got home about five minutes later.

And five minutes after that, we had two lines.

Happy Mother's Day.  Yes.  Yes, it is.

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