Monday, November 6, 2017

Canceling the Negativity

Ugh. I had a bad e-mail morning.

I got an ugly blog comment. Not personally nasty, just rude. Anonymous, of course, because people are like that and as awesome as the internet it is, it will also be more than happy to kick you while you're down. My policy for blog comments is that anything that pisses me off must be FAKE NEWS, which works just fine since I'm not the leader of the free world.

Honestly, I don't care if people out in the world who obviously aren't my friends and who clearly don't care about my feelings agree or disagree with my parenting or decorating decisions. No one else gets to live in my house or raise my kids. I definitely wouldn't make the same choices as a lot of people whom I follow on social media or blogs. I just expect that we aren't dicks about it.

Trust me, it's possible to very politely disagree with someone or make a polite suggestion in the form of constructive criticism. It's also possible to just not make a comment at all. And I know that negativity is a reflection of that person's life, but it's awfully easy to spread ugliness, I guess.

Anyway, I deleted the comment, but it nags, you know? And maybe I'm not supposed to say that or address it on the blog? Because then I'm admitting that it worked and the commenter got what they wanted?

But I'm just being honest. It hurt my feelings and it made me not want to blog.

Also I had a frustrating e-mail from a student in my inbox.

And a zillion other e-mails to sort through (60 to be exact).

And I think the reason e-mail is bothering me is because I'm tired. Coco isn't sleeping well, which means no one is sleeping well. Just looking at her, the way she's holding her little mouth, the slightly weird set of her jaw, like she's trying to hold so still and swallow just right to make it hurt as little as possible--you can just see that her mouth still hurts so bad.

So today I'm feeling tired, but I woke up at 6:15am because my body thought it was 7:15am and for the first time in my life, instead of relishing in the extra hour and snuggling back down in the sheets to doze off for another hour, I actually got up and did yoga before work.

So I guess the score is 2 | 1 for bad vs. good things so far this morning. Sick Coco, bad e-mail, good yoga.

My goal for today is to cancel out the negativity! I obviously can't heal Coco instantly, but Zuzu and I are going to pick up a treat for her on our way home today.

I'm going to try to have a very productive afternoon in my office. I'm going to eat lunch with friends rather than by myself at my desk. I do need to do some grading, but I also get to start a new novel for my Victorian Crime and Detective Fiction class (The Leavenworth Case by Anna Katharine Green). I'll tackle the e-mail so I can cross that off my list. And I'm going to put some positive blog and IG comments out in the world to balance the negative.

And I'm asking for positive suggestions--any no-fail solutions for shaking off a rough start to a day? Anything you do to turn it around when you're feeling bad? Maybe I need to make plans for a bubble bath tonight...

Update: I'm at 2 | 2 now. I got a lovely e-mail from a blog reader I've never met, who shared with me that she recently got a book of matches from a local flower shop in Berlin (!) and the name made her think of my Eliza. All the heart emojis, right?


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