Friday, October 24, 2014

Perhaps This Calls for Psychological Evaluation

Some of you may have seen a video I posted to Instagram last night. I'll post the full (23-second) version here (sorry I didn't flip my phone properly).

Basically, we were eating dinner in the kitchen. Zuzu insisted she was finished, so we let her get out of her high chair, allowing us to have a conversation without her shrieking, "I DONE! Mama! I DONE!" the entire time. She disappeared into the back room and was quiet enough that I got up and checked on her. She was playing with the package of diapers I'd bought for Colette that day. I wasn't thrilled about the idea of her unpacking and unfolding 80 diapers, but she was quiet and occupied in a non-dangerous activity, so I let it roll. Several minutes later, she comes in the kitchen with the package of diapers. The baby's face has a hole in it. She informs us that she bit the baby's nose, and we have the following conversation:

This is a little bit worrisome because just a couple nights previously, she bit Coco's toe.

Like really bit it hard.

Zuzu and I were sitting together and Coco was on my lap facing us and we were making her smile and PRETENDING to nibble on her delicious little toes. Zuzu thought it was hilarious to put Coco's toes in her mouth and say that we were eating them, and Coco thought it was pretty funny, too.

So we're having this super precious family moment of baby-toe-nibbling when suddenly Coco starts SCREAMING--like face red, tensed up, serious screaming. I've only seen her cry like this when she's had a shot (or a terrible blood draw).

I gasped, Zuzu also looked totally shocked, and I said, "Oh, Coco! What happened?"

Then Zuzu said, totally matter-of-factly, "I bit her."

You can imagine the Very Serious Conversation that ensued as David talked with Zuzu about not hurting her sister, not biting babies EVER, and generally not being a sociopath.

In retrospect, perhaps I didn't emphasize enough that we were just PRETENDING to eat Coco's feet? I really thought I made that clear, but evidently not?

On the other hand, Zuzu often says, unprompted, that she loves her sister, but it seems she might have some aggression to work out.

Anyway, since the toe-chomping was soon followed by the biting off the nose of the baby on the diaper package, the mild concern that we could be raising the next Dexter ended up being incredibly timely because I just got a phone call from a local university's graduate psychology department.

I don't remember if I mentioned this on the blog, but last summer at the Farmers' Market, I signed up Zuzu as a volunteer participate in a local university's psychology department. A couple graduate students were working a booth there and they were looking for children between the ages of six months and five years to be on call for various studies that came up. Of course I love the idea of my children being psychological guinea pigs (they could be like the Marshmallow Test Kids at Stanford!), so of course I signed up.

And then the call came in! Zuzu has been asked to participate in a study examining...

wait for it...


in toddlers.


Are there spy cameras hidden in my home? I can't help but wonder.

Anyway, the study consists of her watching a puppet show and then answering some questions. This should be interesting.

Hashtag please don't be a sociopath.

I'll let you know how it goes.


  1. Sympathy in Toddlers. That's a good laugh to start off a Friday.

  2. lol.

    I love Dexter Zuzu. :)

    Yesterday Piper was laid down for a diaper change and Grace walked over and pretended to stomp on her head, so I pushed her foot away and told her we don't do that. I then CAUGHT her foot when she attempted to do it for real. Tears from Grace ensued when I told her we are not nasty or naughty to Piper Jane. She kept screaming, "I loves Pipurs Jane" but I am not convinced either! ha!

  3. Haha. ALL toddlers are sociopaths!