There's no central theme to this post, but just some updates that I wanted to put out there:
I'm reading for fun! My summer class ended over a week ago (hallelujah!) and my friend and coworker earned a spot in heaven by helping me grade final exams. Now that's all behind me and I don't have to think about teaching again until January (when I'm teaching a super fun 3 week class on personal essay writing, followed by a semester of teaching 3 days a week, and then a summer of NO summer classes).
I was reading Mists of Avalon which I was loving, but then I happened upon all of the sex abuse allegations directed at the author (who is now dead) and the book was sort of ruined for me... So I've set it aside. Right now I'm reading Sarah Caudwell mysteries which are hilariously British and also hilarious. I also have My Life in Middlemarch waiting for me. I wrote a chapter of my dissertation on another George Eliot's novel Daniel Deronda, so I'm really looking forward to that one. I also have Guests on Earth on my nightstand, which involves Zelda Fitzgerald. I loved Z so much, so I'm excited about that one, too.
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Speaking of Z's... Zuzu has quit being a good sleeper. She's gone from being a solid 8pm-7am sleeper to being a bedtime-fighter, crib-climber, night-waker, parent-harasser. I realize how spoiled I've been because I am just beside myself on how to deal with this. What do people DO when their kids don't sleep? How do they function? I, for one, become short-tempered and unpleasant (more than usual, haha). We have some strategies we're implementing, but damn. Could her timing be any worse?
And people keep saying she's preparing us for the newborn. Whatever. All a newborn wants is a boob and then we all can enjoy peace and quiet and sleepy time. Zuzu as a newborn was much easier than Zuzu as a mobile, opinionated two-year-old.
What really annoys me is when she says she wants in her crib and then tells me to leave JUST SO SHE CAN THEN CLIMB OUT OF HER CRIB. At one naptime over the weekend she wanted me to clear out of her room instead of sitting in the rocking chair and singing her lullabies and telling her to lie down, so she said, "Go to work, Mama!"
Really makes me feel good, you know? The painful irony is that when she's actually at daycare, she naps just fine with no fuss. #toddlerscanbejerks
Last night we actually had a better night, but I'm not fooled into thinking we've turned a corner.
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I can't stop eating Nutella. Miraculously, I did not gain any weight this past week. I've gained close to 40 pounds already, so it's not like I'm not eating for two. I'll probably gain six more pounds this week. Because Nutella.
Also, Zuzu wanted to try my Nutella and I didn't want to share it with her because I am a mean mommy and I wanted to eat it all myself. So I told her it was HOT.
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I have pregnancy carpal tunnel. It sucks. I had it with Eliza and didn't have it with Zuzu. Of course that freaks me out. It mostly bothers me at night and this time it affects both my hand and my feet. I wear wrist-braces to help the pain and swelling in my hands, but my ankles hurt and I feel pins and needles in my feet when I get up to pee in the night. My hands are still swollen and gripping anything is virtually impossible for the first few hours of the morning (making breakfast for Zuzu is extra fun). And yeah, typing this makes my hands hurt. OH THE SACRIFICES I MAKE so that people can read about the minutiae of my life.
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Today is the first day of my summer that my agenda is totally open. No appointments, no grocery store runs, nothing to do but lie around and read.
Except actually I plan to clean some windows (gross, I know), mop the kitchen floor, do some laundry (I slacked over the weekend), and try to get some of my digital photos organized. It's one of those tasks that doesn't actually take as long as I think it will, is SO SATISFYING when it's completed, and is even enjoyable (except when waiting for photos to upload). So I'm not sure what it is that keeps me from staying on top of it. I did really well Zuzu's first year but definitely dropped the ball this past year. I want to get organized before Rerun gets here so I can recreate some of my favorite photo projects (like the weekly snapshot) with the new babe. Hopefully blogging about it will make me feel accountable. Maybe I need to head out to my favorite coffee shop so I am a bit more motivated...
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I may end up writing more about this, but I had a really productive birth-prep-session with a doula this week. It was a combination of normal conversation, art therapy, and pain management discussion, and I left feeling so much more confident about my previous experiences being able to help me have a good labor and delivery this time (who knew that drawing on big paper with pastels would actually make me feel better?). Of course, my definition of "good" is simply "live baby," so that makes things easier. But she had some really helpful things to say, and I surprised myself with some of the details that came back to me as I told her the stories of Eliza's and Zuzu's births (while crying, because, obviously). I wasn't sure what to expect before this session, but I left feeling lighter and more focused and ready for baby.
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One of the benefits of living in our neighborhood is that we have a beautiful park within walking distance.
One of the downsides to living in this neighborhood with Zuzu is that anytime we go for a walk, she INSISTS that we walk to park and stop at the playground. There is no strolling around, peeping in windows at dusk (from the sidewalk--I'm not a total creeper. I just like to see how people decorate). She has memorized the walk to the park and will start yelling and pointing, "NO! Go, Mama, GO!" if we try to head to another destination.
It's not that I mind going to the park, but I don't trust myself to keep up with her on the bigger slides and climbers, so it means that David chases her around while I stand or sit with Cooper and Zuzu gets exercise while I am bored or look like the detached parent on my phone or make small talk that's not very interesting with other moms.
I would actually like to do some walking that feels productive and allows David and I to have conversations together, so last night we loaded up in the car and drove to another park where we could actually WALK and avoid the playground. Of course Zuzu was only content in the stroller for a short amount of time (another reason I'm holding off on making a double stroller decision until next spring) and then she insisted on walking AND holding Cooper's leash by herself. She uses the phrase "My turn!" to insist that she be allowed to do things on her own. She also wanted to pet every other dog we saw, "Hi, doggie! I touch it!" and while I am a huge dog lover, my experience with Little Mac has taught me NOT to let my toddler run up to strange dogs and touch them.
So I still didn't get a lot of productive walking done. It was pretty funny when we passed one of those work-out stations where a guy was doing pull-ups and Zuzu dropped the leash, ran over to the guy, and said to him, "I do this!" I'm sure she wanted to hang upside down as she did with Bop, but instead we let the guy work out in peace and told Zuzu it was not, in fact, her turn.
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We are going to a wedding this weekend and I'm really looking forward to it. It's friends of mine from grad school so many of my favorite grad school people will be there and I think it will be really fun. My birthday is also coming up, although we have no big plans for that. But dinner out is exciting for me, so that's fine.
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Okay, seriously. This cobweb in the living room window has been driving me crazy for WEEKS and it's time that I do something about it.
After I eat a Nutella + graham cracker sandwich and finish this chapter in the book I'm reading...