Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Introducing The Deuce

So here's the deal.  I'm pregnant.

Shocking, I know, right?  I'm pretty sure most people guessed it from my not-too-subtle end-of-2011 post.

I'm just over sixteen weeks along.  Yup, that means that the month after I posted this, I got a positive pregnancy test.  It was not that easy, though, and I may write a little more about that later.

So now I'm pregnant.  At least, I think I am.  Let's be honest, I haven't heard the heartbeat since my doctor appointment on January 11th, so there's plenty of room to wonder--are you still alive in there, baby? (I freaking hope so).

Anyway, we feel exactly the way you might expect.  We're thrilled and we're terrified.  And we basically ride the waves of those emotions up and down on any given day.

We didn't know what to call this baby, since Baby Duck was already taken by Eliza, and if Eliza were here, asserting her toddlerhood, we might have space for another Baby Duck in our hearts and conversations, but, well, she is our Baby Duck.  So this is... Baby Duck Number Two?  And that was just too long to say over and over again.  So that's how this baby became The Deuce.

(Also because we're very klassy and we can't come up with a nickname for our second child that is not also a synonym for poop.)

I've been waiting to post about this pregnancy because I still feel like every time I mention it, I'm just inviting disaster.  But guess what my therapist told me?  There's absolutely no correlation between talking about pregnancy and pregnancy loss.  (It sounds so obvious in retrospect, but she said that and I thought to myself, "OMG.  This is why I'm paying to talk to you.  Because you say logical and rational things that I need to hear.")  We also waited a while to tell people we know in real life, and I didn't want word getting around through the wilds of the interwebz (Where, you know, everyone is just ABUZZ about what might be going on in my uterus.  It's like I'm Beyonce or something.)

So anyway, that's where we are.  At this point, things appear to be going well.  (But remember, says the dark, twisty voice in my head, things also appeared to be going perfectly well with Eliza).  In all probability, this baby will be okay.  But we know better to put complete faith in statistics (probability can kiss my ass), and we are still a long way from my official due date of July 1.

So wish me luck.  Because I think we freaking need it.

50 comments:

LauraJane said...

:)

pulling and hoping for a beautiful deuce... uh. haha :)

Sarah said...

Oh I thought so! And I am so happy reading this that I just started to cry (I have a touch of the crazy hormones with this baby, and also I am really really happy for you).

Andy Linsenbardt said...

Congratulations and good luck! Brooke L. picked up on your not-so-subtle hinting in a previous post. We'll be thinking of you, David and Deuce!

car said...

All the best Brooke. The pregnancy after loss is hard work, but so worth it (speaking as the mom of a 1 week old "rainbow"). Will be sending positive vibes out toward you and the deuce.

Sara L. Uckelman said...

Lots and lots of good luck! This is lovely news to hear.

The Busters said...

The Deuce!!! I love it!! This is wonderful news. So happy for you and will definitely be sending lots of good thoughts!

Molly said...

Surprised but thrilled to see your out yourself! I didnt think you were dropping hints before so I'm surprised so many picked up on it! Yay for Deuce!

still life angie said...

Eep. Cautiously optimistic with you. Come on, I'll Duce, give your mama a kick in there. Love to you. Xo

Tiffany said...

so so thrilled for you guys. keeping you and The Deuce in my thoughts and prayers every step of the way. i understand exactly how terrifying it can be. but one day at a time... ((hugs))

Becca said...

This is great news! I can only imagine how you guys are feeling. I will be thinking about you and sweet Baby Deuce!

todd. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Becky said...

Congrats! I was kind of wondering. Will be thinking about you and your little deuce that your pregnancy will be uneventful.

Angie said...

Yay! Love the nickname! :)

Hopefully you will start feeling that kid start moving soon! (Though that too can be nervewrecking, since they don't move 24/7.)

One day at a time!

todd. said...

Congratulations! That's so fantastic.

Angela said...

Wonderful, wonderful news! I know the mixed emotions that come with pregnancy after loss. Thinking of you guys, and sweet baby Deuce!

loribeth said...

Yay! Fabulous news! : ) Fingers & toes all crossed for you.

brianna said...

I'm so happy to hear this! And yes, it is both thrilling and terrifying. I wish you all the luck in the world.

Wiley said...

Like it! Pregnancy after a loss is an entirely different experience. I'm 11 weeks pregnant with another set of twins that are a complete surprise given I have an IUD and it landed me back at the grief counselor. Just the stresss of it. Luckily, I have a fantastic and understandin doctor, so getting very frequent confirmation of their continued good. Hope you are lucky enough to have the same.

Oh and this set? They're Panda and Bear. Not as cool as Heart & Eggplant of the last pregnancy, but hopefully it ends in no one stillborn this time.

nurslouisa said...

Many congradulations!!!! Wonderful news I'm so glad you shared, may you have an uneventful 9 months.

Natasha said...

Congratulations! Pregnancy after losing a child is joyful and so very hard all at the same time. Taking things one day at a time is the way I got through it. My brain could only manage so much at one time. Praying for you guys as you get ready for your little Deuce!

Tess said...

Congratulations and good luck Brooke!
Pregnancy after loss is a white knuckle ride of highs and lows, strap yourselves in and keep taking a day at a time.

Hope's Mama said...

I'm so happy for you. Lean on us when you can. So many wonderful women will hold you up through these terrifying months. I don't mean to scare you by saying that, but I think after 16 weeks you have already figured out this is going to be one crazy scary ride.
xo

Sherri said...

I missed the hints as well! Hoping all continues to go well! Congratulations!

Anonymous said...

YAY!!!
From Kaley's mom

erica said...

This is very happy news! I'm keeping you and your little Deuce in my thoughts and hoping that the next several weeks are as happy and uneventful as possible.

B. Wilson said...

<3 <3 <3

Monique said...

I kind of suspected, I'm so glad my intuition was right! Congratulations - I know how happy/scared you are right now and if you need any support, we're here. Pregnancy after loss is a scary ride, but thankfully, it goes by relatively quickly. Just think - in 4 more weeks, you're half way there.

Jessica said...

So excited for you! Hoping for the very best for you and Baby Deuce!!!

katie illingworth said...

Yay! Praying for the little Deucie. Stay strong in there, little one!

SG said...

Congrats! I'm three days behind you (due July 4) and going through the ups and downs, too...

Renel said...

Whoop! So glad you're out of the closet!, the water closet that is, with the deuce and all :).
Guess what I got in the mail today? And it worked! ;)
So beyond thrilled for you.

Kate said...

GOOD LUCK! I'm rooting for you. And congratulations, too! That's very exciting. :)

Sara said...

So happy for you!! Congratulations!

Josh Jackson said...

Come on buddy! Great news, though we did notice the little confession in the 2011 post. :)

Michelle M. said...

So so happy for you! Congratulations!

Caroline said...

Can Baby Deuce's first book please be "Everybody Poops"???

And many congrats many more times :)

Amelia said...

Much love to all four of you. Congratulations!

Addi's mom said...

So happy to read about Eliza's little brother or sister. Welcome to the crazy train that is pregnancy after loss even though you have been "on the ride" for a while now! Wishing luck and all the other good stuff your way.

My New Normal said...

That's amazing news. Congrats!!

Anonymous said...

I'm so happy for you..Enjoy the ride, try not to worry too much.
I never got my second chance. Just know how blessed you are.
Deena

Anonymous said...

Congratulations, Brooke! I'm really happy to hear it.
-M

Anonymous said...

So happy for you! If you go to the bump.com you can add a little growth chart/count down to your blog that's kinda cute. praying for you!

Anonymous said...

http://global.thebump.com/tickers/default.aspx

Andrea said...

Such happy news. Congrats!

Cath said...

This is wonderful news! Congratulations (and good luck)!

Anonymous said...

The best news!!! Congratulations!!! I will keep The Deuce and your family in my prayers.

Love's mom FOREVER said...

Ah, the Deuce. Too cute! I have been looking for hints and didn't see any, so I guess the joke's on me! Glad you have finally outed yourself, and now we can celebrate and be terrified together.
Love to you, David, Eliza, and The Deuce.

Leslie said...

Well for some reason blogger's word verification does not like me but I figured out how to comment differently! LOL!
Sending such love and light for the deuce.. and hoping you will enjoy every moment writing as you share this pregnancy with your readers! XO

Janet said...

Congratulations! Thanks for also giving some hope to this babylost mama. Wishing you all the very best!

Lori said...

sweet lady, i saw this post last week while i was at work and have been too busy to come back over here and say: YEEHAW! this is such grand news, and I am so excited for you. wishing you and david much love and luck this time around. clear eyes, full heart, can't lose. xo